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- Signs of the Season

From a toy store: "Ho, ho, ho spoken here."

- In a bridal boutique: "Marry Christmas."

- Outside a church: "The Original Christmas Club."

- From a department store ad: "Big pre-Christmas sale. Come in and mangle with the crowd."

- In a Texas jewelry store: "Diamond tiaras - $70,000. Three for $200,000.

- In a Jenny Craig ad: "24 Shaping Days until Christmas."

- In a stationery store: "For the man who has everything - a calendar to remind him when payments are due."
 

   
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